Why do people think some things are cool?

Let me explain.

Children think that cell phones are cool. Americans think that British tea parties are cool. British think that Starbucks is cool. Japanese think that speaking English is cool. Those people who can't go to college think that university students are cool.

...

Having lived in the USA, Great Britain, and Japan, I don't see what's so cool about any of them. Having owned a cell phone for 5 years now, I don't see what's so cool. Having gotten into a world-class university, I don't see what's so cool.

Let me explain.

See, I was on a debate team. That meant I got to dress in suits, complain about time, carry laptops around, drink Starbucks, dash into fast-food chains to grab breakfast, shove donuts in my mouth because I didn't have time, call on cell phone constantly, go around the USA on planes from one place to another, create documents ON the plane, do homework ON the plane. Yeah. A mini-businesswoman, even decked out in heels. I got to wear make-up with suit. Write furiously on legal pads.

Stuff that others might think it's "cool".

I hated all of it.

Suits are uncomfortable, hot in hot weather and cold in cold weather. Worst set of clothes ever to be invented, I'm not joking. Laptops are heavy. In fact, I'd rather live in the world without computers. They mean papers, calculations, programs, and WORK. Ew. I don't like Starbucks. Every morning I went there (I'm talking about 6:00 AM here), I see miserable-looking businessmen drinking Starbucks, mainly to get sugar for the morning (because they can't get breakfast), wake up (from not sleeping the previous night because of work and feeling drowsy). It's a misery-fest. It is NOT a place I wanted to be at the crack of dawn. But I was one of them... writing cases till 4 in the morning, getting a 30 minute nap if possible, changing into a suit, dashing out the door.

Cell phones. Urrrrrgh. I NEEDED a cell phone because I was everywhere BUT home. I was never home on Saturdays, I had to stay after school for meetings, I had violin lessons. Not a happy time.

Going on the plane for business. Can someone explain to me why this is cool? A nice cruise might be fun, but a plane is the most unromantic craft I've ever known. Typing on the laptop on the plane? Sure, might look cool for you, but for me (and other people who have to do that), the due date for that document was probably 5 hours ago. We just want to get the thing done. Most likely those people are also sleep-deprived, and high on sugar and caffeine.

Heels. Yes, they might look cool and businesslike and grown-up, kids, but they're painful if you have to stay in them for 6 hours without a chair. You go try it and see if it's actually cool.

Speaking English. Which would you take? Having, at the pain of death (no, really, I mean death) learning English, or not having the pain of death but not being able to speak English. I'd take the latter, thank you very much. Life-threatening danger is a little too much of a cost for anything.

And lastly, tea parties. WHY DON'T YOU SEE THAT MOST BRITISH PEOPLE DON'T HAVE TEA PARTIES PERIOD?! WAAARRRRRRRRRRGH!

Ah. That felt good.